disturbing: part deux
1. getting old on the internet. literally, watching my own - and the age of others - increase over the years. i was once 22. i'm now turning 28. some dates seem like yesterday, but they really happened 3 years ago. time freaks me out.2. i make fun of short men. short men tend to like me; in all of my curvy and womanly glory. i think it might have something to do with being smothered or mothered - maybe both...i can't figure it out. i call myself a heightest - but the truth - i've deduced - is that i actually like a short man. apparently, i have some closet fetish for a smallish humping baby seal - if you will. it's sort of like how men make fun of fat girls, but in reality - they're aching to bang the fat girl. growing up, my next door neighbor made fun of me for being the fat girl. he ended up marrying a 6'2" big girl, that little lanky turd. it's all starting to make sense; to really come together. i think i'm understanding men and myself - a little more everyday.
3. i was listening to jeff buckley in the shower yesterday. thank christ the lady bic was no where near me...as i officially decided that "lover you should've come over" is undoubtedly the most painful 6 minutes and 41 seconds a woman can experience while trying to cleanse and relax her inner being.
4. about a month ago a co-worker asked me if he could have an extra ticket to take some girl to an event we were hosting. i said: "why'd you want want to do that? don't pussy corner yourself by bringing a date to the party. there's gonna be a ton of ass to be had." and have ass he did. now i'm grossed out that i gave such good advice.
posted by tinamarie @ 10:38 AM
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